Guitars rock...literally

So, I think I realized the other day how much I really go love the guitar. I mean, ever since I started playing, I've always enjoyed it, but it wasn't until this weekend that I truly realized how much I really like it. Now, I've grown up in a music family: my dad is a music professor here at UNL, and his dad was a high school music teacher, so music has certainly been a big part of our family. This may be the reason I like guitar so much, but then I realized that I hated playing the piano and violin when I was younger, so that couldn't be the case. At least not entirely.

Like I said, I've always enjoyed playing. I wasn't too keen on playing for church group or in front of lots of people, but I would just mess around on my own quite a bit. But as I got better, I started to like it more and more, and was more and more comfortable playing in front of other people. I guess when it comes to music, I like sounds much more than voices. That's why I will listen to artists with pretty bad voices; as long as their music is good. So when I am playing and get a sound that I like, (and I am not trying to make myself sound like the best guitar player in the world, because I am most certainly not), it makes me really happy and I can play it over and over again. Plus, I really like playing in a band setting with another guitar and drums and all that, because it is probably one of the greatest feelings to be able to "rock out" as so many people have said.

Perhaps at this point I should inform you as to what caused me to come to this stunning revelation of how much I like guitar. Like I said, it wasn't too long ago that I didn't really like getting in front of people and playing. But before the weekend came around, I was asked by the youth pastor at my church if I would play for the high school Sunday school class. Not only did I agree to do it, but I found myself actually wanting to and was looking forward to it for the rest of the week. So I started to wonder what made me want to get in front of people with the possibility of messing up and making a huge fool of myself - I would then go into deep depression and my self-esteem would drop like a rock, and I would probably go into some sort of shock and never be able to talk or move again. (Okay, so maybe that's a little far-fetched, but who knows, the snowball effect can be pretty dangerous sometimes).

Well first off, I found that playing guitar is a big release for me. Whenever I'm doing homework or have had a busy day, I can just pick up the guitar and start playing and feel a lot better when I am done. I think it's one of those things where I could probably just play it until my fingers fell off, which may not be a good thing (not that my fingers would fall off, but that I could waste that much time playing it). But it is something that I rarely get bored of.

Secondly, I think that (and hope that) the main reason I like it so much is the ability to worship God with it. Worship is a big thing in our family, more so than music, and I have always felt that it is one of the most important things that we can do in our Christian walk. Worship is basically what we think of God and how that makes us respond. My dad used to be the worship leader at our church, and my mom was nearly as active in that as my dad was, so I grew up seeing the value that they put on worship and have hopefully taken some of that for myself. When I realize that when I am playing for either the college or high school group, or sometimes even the entire church body, I am bringing them before the throne of God in worship, and that is a humbling and even frightening thought, much more than the thought of messing up. So when I realize that, I am more worried that my heart is in the right place and that I am prepared to come before God. When I start playing, I find that I block out everyone else around me, and just focus on the song and what I am singing, which is why I am not as concerned about how well I do. But hopefully, it is the aspect of worship that makes playing the guitar so enjoyable for me.

As I look back on this, I can see how it will probably be long and boring for those of you who are reading. I apologize and I will wrap this up now.

So I really do like playing the guitar, maybe more than I should and I probably waste more time than I should on it. But I guess there are worse things I could be doing with my time (like homework :)) and if it helps me worship God better than I would without it, well, then I wouldn't trade it for the world.